Steinbrenner high school drivers, mainly students and parents, have never had a more spectacular driving record. This revelation has caught the attention of Central Comedy, a new television station, that wants to judge and reward the best drivers on a student campus.
The crew of the show has selected Steinbrenner to participate. Hidden cameras across the parking lots, exits and entrances of the school, and adjacent streets are meant to catch student and parent drivers at their finest moments.
All video is currently being taken into consideration and the results of the contest are expected by next month. The winner is expected to receive a complimentary hazardous driver bumper sticker and admittance to a special conference held by the Hillsborough County Police Department in the county jail.
“Last year I was the winner and I got all these cool freebies,” said Blake Jailbierd. “It’s basically prison but other than that it was still an amazing experience.”
The crew has given several pointers on what they are looking for in order to win the grand prize.
The students need to speed. Many students already fit the requirement since they frequently zoom out of the parking lot with a speed that could outrun the SR-71 Blackbird, the fastest jet ever, and can go even faster through the school zone.
“Once the bell rings I just want to leave. I couldn’t care less about being courteous to those around me,” said Jackson Fasterton.
Other measures like the one taken by Fasterton, are supposedly given points based on how epic and inconsiderate to others the maneuver is. Things like blowing through stop signs, running red lights, cutting in front of each other (especially in the morning) and “accidentally” rear ending other cars are rumored to give the highest points.
Not only that, but the highest score is given to drivers who show blatant disregard for the safety of those students nearest them, whether they be in a car or on the street as a pedestrian.
“Earlier this year, I was walking home and I nearly died when a parent was speeding out of the school,” said Amanda Walker “The driver almost hit me. I mean it was my fault because I shouldn’t have walked on the crosswalk, even when the pedestrian sign said go.”
Another stunt that was encouraged was the astonishing parking students tend to practice regularly. Major pointers that the crew gave were to make sure that the driver ignored the white lines on the pavement and battle for the worst parking job.
“I think the simplistic graffiti on the ground of the parking lot is very artistic, but I don’t understand the point of it,” said Ima Eediot. “I just tend to park over them.”
Find more information about the contests and the other ways to get points on page 22.
Marielyssa Hernandez // Opinion Editor
